Teach Me How

How to love. How to feel. How to share.

How can one who has taught so many, not know how himself? I mean I understand the outer and inner workings of it. But yet I still make the same mistakes as others do. Except my mistakes are educated mistakes. You see, I know the difference between love and being in-love. But knowing the difference has not obtained love for me. I put my trust and faith in the Lord. I understand, know, and believe that God is love. So why must I endure the same trials as those who don’t know? I know I have my faults. But I know for a fact that I am a good man. I don’t cheat, I don’t smoke, I don’t drink, I don’t do drugs, and I don’t have any children(R.I.P. Mercedez Ania Stevens). And on top of that my record is impeccable. I have a bachelors degree, I am a member of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity, Inc., I am a Prince Hall Free & Accepted Mason, amongst other prestigious affiliations. I’m a perfect gentleman. And who could forget that I am sexier than applesauce. Just a little humor for you. I have loved and lost. I have loved and won, but still lost. But not once have I been in-love.

For people who don’t know, to love and to be in-love are two entirely different things. You can love anyone. There can always be love in many situations. But everyone can not be in-love. When you are in-love nothing else matters accept that person you are in-love with. And when you are in-love the other person is in-love with you. It takes two people to be in-love. And I know a lot of you are saying that your in-love or have been in-love. But honesty you have just loved and included infatuation in it. But that does not pertain to the happily married. I believe you only can be in-love once. And that is with your soul-mate. The one specific person God has created for you.

Addiction is something that you cant stop. If you cant control your emotional state, then you must be addicted to it. How can someone say their in-love with a specific person? When in reality they are only in-love with the anticipation of the emotions their addicted to. Because the same person can fall out of favor the next week by not complying. I am not one of those people that throw around words for others or my own gratification. Now I need to understand how to use and live with my addiction. I am addicted to love.

So now I know of my desired addiction. But how do I obtain it? How do I feel it? How do I share it? God says that the man should go out and find his woman. So now I must search with the assistance of the Lord. Those who sit and wait; what are you waiting for? It will not fall in your lap. God does for those who are doing for themselves. And one thing I hear people constantly say is, “I need to find myself before I be with someone else”. And I ask you, “are you serious?”. I’m going to be completely honest with you: you will never find yourself, because you are yourself. You cant find you, but you can create you. You make you. The choices you make, make you. You cant find yourself. You must create yourself. See here I go teaching again. But seriously, I know that my soul-mate is out there. But when she comes into my life or if she is already in my life already; how can I love her?

Maybe I can teach myself. Ohh, I forgot that I tried that already. So I guess I’m back at where I started. Maybe she knows who she is, but she is afraid of letting me know. I have everything in my life except my love for her. So please teach me how to love. Show me the way to surrender my heart. Girl I'm so lost. Teach me how to love. How I can get my emotions involved? Teach me; show me how to love. So if you know its you, or you can show me. Then can you please TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE???



Proper.